A common question I get asked is, what actually happens in a coaching session? And I get it. There are lots of different meanings to the word coach and if you’ve never had a coaching session before you might be wondering what it involves.
1. CONFIDENTIALITY – This is key for the coaching relationship. To get the most out of your coaching sessions you need to feel 100% comfortable to say whatever it is that you are feeling and thinking. Understanding therefore that the conversations you have with your Coach are completely confidential is crucial.
2. NO JUDGMENT – Coaching sessions are judgment free zones. As mums we may have been through a lot of similar experiences, but they are all unique and so are we as people, with our own views, circumstances, and dreams. What is important is that you find the right path for you rather than the path you or anyone else thinks you should be taking.
3. LEAVE EVERYTHING AT THE DOOR – I know how it is. As much as we like to think we’ll have time to prepare ourselves and get into the headspace before we go into a meeting or appointment, life is busy! There often just isn’t the time to take a breath and clear our minds, or we decide there’s time just to put one more washing load on or quickly finish some other job that needs doing…
But what does this mean? We go into the next thing feeling flustered and not properly focused. So usually I start my sessions with a short but really effective breathing exercise to make sure you are fully present and we can get as much value out of our time together as possible.
4. SET EXPECTATIONS – I will always ask you at the beginning of the session what it is you want to achieve by the end of our time together. What is it that you would like to be leaving the session with? How do you want to feel at the end of the session? How will you know when you have achieved this? This is really useful to nail down at the beginning so that we can keep checking in throughout the session so we can make sure we’re on the right path.
5. REFLECT – If we’ve had a session together previously you will have set yourself actions to work on so we will take some time to see how you got on with those and how you feel about them now. If you have taken action that’s great, we will reflect on how that feels, what it means to you and how you want to build on that. If you haven’t managed to achieve your action points, I’m not here to tell you off but instead I hold you accountable. I’m here to help you question why you weren’t able to move forward with your actions, are they still relevant to your end goal and if they are what needs to change so that next time you will feel able to take action.
6. EXPLORATION – We will spend the session exploring and gaining a better understanding of what is going on for you. As your Coach I will be asking you questions, challenging you to think deeper, to reflect further, to gain clarity and to uncover what is currently standing in the way of you achieving your dreams.
7. DELVE INTO MORE THAN JUST THE PROBLEM – So often we think we just need to address one specific issue, for example confidence at work, making time for exercise etc. But to make significant change in these things we need to look at your mindset and the whole of you. This might sound daunting but it can actually be really exciting and bring about really positive life changes!
8. ACTION – Coaching is forward-looking, and action focused. Towards the end of the session, I will encourage you to set action points that you can work on between sessions that will get you closer to your bigger goals. These actions don’t always have to be huge scary overnight life-changing actions. Consistently taking small steps will always get you closer to your vision but it is important to keep taking them as without them, nothing will change.
ADVICE – A Coach will never give you advice or their view or opinion on what you should think or what you should do. That’s not the role of a Coach. As your Coach I believe that you have the answers that you need yourself but you just haven’t found them yet. And that’s really common! So often we’re sat with our own thoughts and ideas or we talk to our partner, friends and family about what’s on our mind. But rarely to we get the opportunity to speak with someone further outside your life, completely objective and where the focus is solely on what you want to talk about.
In this judgment free zone it’s a safe space for you to explore your thoughts and beliefs freely, to be challenged in a way that feels good for you but that opens up a different, fresh perspective. And with this, we often get those light bulb or aha moments where the path ahead becomes clearer and decisions can be made from a place of knowing and therefore come with ease.
But, these insights don’t come from me. They come from you, it’s just my role to help you find them. And the importance of this is that it is the key to long-lasting and transformational change. The way you envision your future and the choices you are making come from you because we have done the work to explore what is true and the best thing for you. Not because somebody has advised you that xyz would be the best thing for YOUR life.
I hope this has given you a bit more of an idea about what to expect from a coaching session. But if you have any further questions or if your interest has been raised then book a 20 minute discovery call with me so we can discuss how coaching can help you.